The Monogrammed Pillowcases Are Lovely...

...but you see, I didn't take his name.



I had assumed that, eloping, I'd manage to miss some of those trappings. You know, crystal picture frames and wedding-cake candles. But nope, the two biggest proponents of trappings in my life -- that is, my mother and CV's sister, who can both be trusted to purchase Christmas themed knickknacks for me EVERY YEAR -- both came through right off the bat, the second they got the announcements.

So now we have monogrammed pillowcases (which are nice, and the monogram is amusing), and my mother came through with the fancy ring-shaped picture frames, scripted with something like "I thee wed," the better to forever crystallize our decor around eight-and-a-half minutes in Vegas.

But have you been in our living room? (This is a rhetorical question, of course.) It's all angular bookshelves and modernist chairs. We already have ONE fancy silver picture frame you gave us before.

Where are the others to go? Where shall we build the shrine to us?

I know you mean well but you make my task more difficult. I am trying to purge the excess, not make room for more.